Rob Madge on Finally Bringing My Son's a Queer to New York: "I Don't Take No for an Answer!"

“A dream is a wish your heart makes, especially when it breaks, I guess,” Rob Madge says, but it’s with a smile.

They’re sat in a hotel room, giddy having just announced that their autobiographical show My Son’s A Queer (But What Can You Do?) will receive its long-awaited NYC premiere. It comes after winning awards, selling out in the West End, multiple trips to the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, and then an ill-fated proposed Broadway run last year.

“When the idea to bring the show to New York was presented to me as an option all that time back, I just thought, well, if that’s an available option, then I’d love to. And I don’t take no for an answer,” they said. “I’ve had a real sense of determination as a consequence of this past year and not just with regard to the show. With the way that the political climate of the world is right now, I feel more energized to get this show on and to spread its message.”

Madge’s show celebrates family and freedom, using their home videos from living room performances as a child to recreate their own infamous Disney parade as an adult.

“New York City, it’s the heartbeat of theater and I feel like it’s also the heartbeat of the queer community,” Madge noted, particularly excited that the shows at New York City Center coincide with Pride in June.

Speaking about art as activism, Madge comments: “I think in its subtlety, it can really change people’s minds. You’re presenting a story in a space which has this shared communal feel where everybody is receiving the same kind of message, and you’re also experiencing other people receiving that message at the same time.”

“That’s why I love doing theater,” they explained, “Because of that buzz and the electricity within the audience. People can talk about it afterwards, and they can talk about what they saw and how they feel about it, and it can prompt conversations that don’t necessarily happen in spaces other than theaters.”

There are a lot of laughs in the show (with the home footage of Madge’s relatives often threatening to steal the show), but really tender moments of reflection, too. All are punctuated with tunes co-written with Pippa Cleary, which pay tribute to Madge’s Granny Grimble’s costuming and their dad famously missing their cue, “Oh, Bert.” A song called “We Will Be Loved Anyway” is a soft anthem of the magic of acceptance. But the one that sticks right now is surely the celebratory “Anything is Possible”.

The song-writing duo is also working on more music, Madge hints, plus there’s another announcement on the horizon. Speaking of this moment, they added: “This is my dream and I feel like this ticks it off the bucket list. So I have less tunnel vision, I guess. I’m open to anything now.”

The humour can be “quite specific” (one look at Madge’s TikTok page should give a pretty strong indication), perhaps not quite realizing how many people it tickles with nostalgia, not only for childhood homes but for growing up in the 1990. There are references to British pantomimes (Rob is a regular at the London Palladium during the holiday season) and Woolies (a greatly missed high street retailer called Woolworths, we’re told), which are being explained for the US run, but “ultimately, the core message will remain the same.”

Part of the show sees a collection of other people’s video-cam footage of their own living room performances. “It’s beautiful,” adds Madge, recognizing everyone’s experiences.

“I will always want to show that queerness can be joyful and celebratory. Any way that I gets to do that, oh my goodness, I will.”

The conversation turns to Howard Ashman, the famed playwright and lyricist. “Disney was really struggling at the end of the 70s, early 80s, and then somebody saw Little Shop of Horrors and went ‘These two, these Menken and Ashman guys, we need them to save our company,’ and they did,” Madge explains happily. Together, they wrote songs for The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, and Aladdin. 

“I love the idea that this mainstream form of art, this commercial form of family entertainment was spearheaded by a very, very queer man,” Madge continues. “A New York gay guy influenced all of these things…people would say, ‘It’s for children. How dare you?’ I mean, we see it now, whenever queerness is remotely attached to a project, especially family entertainment, it’s seen as some kind of crazy, brand-new thing. But we’ve always been here.”

For Madge, the show and its values “feel like it’s more of a mission,” especially today. “It’s not just me wanting to do a show and sing a few songs. I have a real drive to show what good parenting can be.”

“I will always be so proud of being able to show off my brilliant family. Fundamentally, if I get a chance to show someone how amazing my grandmother was or my dad and my mum are, I will jump at that opportunity because they’re just brilliant people.”

And now, that message is finally going transatlantic.