Review: Milo Cramer’s Musical Satire No Singing in the Navy Suddenly Strikes a Timely Note

One wonders if Milo Cramer ever suspected that their No Singing in the Navy, which mocks the uncritical patriotism of golden-age musicals, would be as timely as it is right now. A lesser show could get bogged down by the weight of real-life politics. Luckily, this production at Playwrights Horizons is buoyant and effervescent—yet, in the end, devastating.

Three sailors (Bailey Lee, Elliot Sagay, and Ellen Nikbakht) are enjoying their lives on the sea when their Captain (also played by Nikbakht) arrives with jarring news: it’s time to go to war. This information is conveyed in a staccato ditty that repeats the word “war.” Which war, and why it’s being fought, is not important. What matters is that they have 24 hours in the big city before they ship off to certain death.

There’s also one rule: no singing. The sailors initially comply, though it’s obvious they will fail. “I’m suspicious of this,” Sailor 2 sings as he fights the urge to break into song, “Because my experience is singing’s weird! If you sing that makes you weird. Singing is annoying!”

The lyrics are delightful brain-ticklers: they’re deceptively simple but create humor by stating the subtext of more flowery showtunes. The catchy songs are full of motifs that reference classic musicals like The Music Man, The Sound of Music, and, of course, On the Town.

As they sing, the sailors fritter the hours onshore away in progressively absurd ways. They attempt to sneak into a theater. One searches for a lost love. Another plans to kiss 100 women. All the while, none of them forget they are soon going to die. Largely sung throughout, the show gradually gets more slapstick, even as the reality that these sailors are not long for this world sinks in.

Ellen Nikbakht is the standout, catching laughs with almost every line as Sailor 3, the evil Captain, and a teeny-bopper ticket-seller named Theater. Elliot Sagay also shows range as Sailor 2, abruptly switching from goofy optimism to Tennessee Williams-like asides about the apple tree he used to climb on the family farm.

The secret MVP is Kyle Adam Blair as the Pianist (Blair is also the music director). As the only non-singing, non-silly non-sailor, he’s the perfect straight man. His distaste is apparent as the others roll across his piano and stick various body parts in his face. The last castmate, Bailey Lee, is a weaker link. Sailor 1 matches the other sailors beat for beat in silliness, but Lee spends the most time in other characterizations that are a bit bland, particularly the Heroine Crab.

Ah, the crabs. The one failing here is a subplot about a young crab (Lee) who escapes the bucket where her family lives, explores the sea, and finds out the wide ocean is a little too much for her. The anthropomorphized characters don’t totally drag down the production; one of the most charming songs features two ants singing about how much they love each other.

But their scenes are too disjointed from the sailors, as their storylines only overlap in twice. Plus, the coming-of-age story, played mostly straight besides the fact that it’s about crabs, doesn’t totally jive thematically with the satire. It feels like Cramer had two half-musicals of strong material that they combined rather than building out further. The actors also don’t embody the animals with their physicality enough to suspend disbelief—I was constantly aware that I was watching people pretending to be crabs. I’m not totally sure what essence of crab was missing, but going deeper into the weirdness probably would have helped.

This applies to the other production elements too. The lighting (Masha Tsimring), costumes (Enver Chakartash), and scenery (Krit Robinson) could have used a creative push. There’s one stand-out moment where Sailor 1 tries to drown Sailor 3 in the tinsel curtain representing the ocean. More moments like that would have matched the inventiveness of the book and music. Aside from these missteps, Aysan Celik’s direction keeps things rollicking while hurtling the characters toward their dark ends.

The gradual shift in tone from light to dark is masterfully done, culminating in the heartbreaking final moments. This piece would be timeless under normal circumstances, but with American boots on the ground in conflicts all over the world, now it’s downright chilling. Something tells me I’ll be thinking a lot about these sailors in years to come.