Power Up!

It was around this time every year that Theater Week editor John Harris and his associate Michael Riedel would start putting together an annual list of “The Most Powerful People in Theater Today” for their first-week-of-August anniversary issue. It wasn’t their original idea, of course. For years previously, Forbes had come out with lists of “The Most Powerful People in Business” and The Sporting News had been rating “The Most Powerful People in Sports.” Even such lesser-known publications as Modern Healthcare were coming up with “The Most Powerful People in Medicine.”

The Harris-Riedel lists took a number of factors into consideration. Money, of course, was a significant barometer. Influence, needless to say, was another. Yet I found that I rarely agreed with the editors’ selections, though I never verbalized my opinions to them. Someday, I thought, I’ll come out with my own list of “The Most Powerful People in Musical Theater” that really shows who has the influence and the money. And today, I’m proud to announce, is the day.

Undoubtedly, you will have your own ideas, and I’d love to hear them. But I stand behind my list of “The Most Powerful People in Musical Theater,” as follows:

     1. Jesus Christ (Godspell and Jesus Christ Superstar): ‘Nuff said.

     2. The Starkeeper (Carousel): The highest judge of all.

     3. Mr. Applegate (Damn Yankees, a/k/a The Snake in The Apple Tree): Let’s face it.

     4. Audrey II (Little Shop of Horrors): Despite what just happened in Florida.

     5. Superman (It’s a Bird…It’s a Plane…It’s Superman): Who brings the orphans’ Christmas turkey? Who flew an asthmatic son to Albuquerque? In this world of evil and doubt, we need him.

     6. Zoltar (Big): If he can grant any wish you want, including the one to be big, he’s a force with which to be reckoned.

     7. Jupiter Rex (Out of This World): Though he’s a god, he’s a god, he’s a god, he does lose a few points for not keeping his mind on his work, now that he’s positively teeming with sex.

     8. Merlin (Camelot and Merlin): Granted, he made a bigger impression in the former musical than in the latter one, but anyone who can go from old age to birth is someone who impresses me.

     9. Carrie (Carrie): And I don’t mean Pipperidge. I’m talkin’ about that kid who straightened out all those kids at the prom.

     10. Meyer Rothschild (The Rothschilds): His wife will never have to see apologetic looks in her husband’s eyes.

     11. His Royal Highness Christopher Rupert Windemere Vladimir Carl Alexander Francois Reginald Lancelot Herman Gregory James (Cinderella): Yes, you think of him as only the prince, but I have it on good authority that he recently assumed the throne after the death of both his mother, Queen Constantina Charlotte Ermantrude Guenevere Maisie Marguerite Ann and his father, the former King Maximillian Godfrey Ladislaus Leopold Sidney Frederick John.

     12. Miles Gloriosus (A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum): He, slaughterer of thousands, oppressor of the meek, subduer of the weak, degrader of the Greek, destroyer of the Turk. Look at those arms! Look at that chest! Look at them — not to mention the rest. Even I am impressed!

     13. Shogun’s Mother (Pacific Overtures): She took over after serving some chrysanthemum tea.

     14. King Arthur (Camelot): Sure, it didn’t end too well for the guy, but think of what he did while he was in office. Besides, anyone who can pull a sword out of a stone has my respect.

     15. Radames (Aida): He seized the day, he turned the tide, he touched the stars, he mocked the grave, he moved into uncharted lands.

     16. Evita Duarte Peron (Evita): For a while there, she was high-flying, adored. Maybe her story was quite usual; local girl makes good, weds famous man. She was slap in the right place at the perfect time, filled a gap. She was lucky. But one thing I’ll say for her: No one else could fill it like she could.

     17. The King of Siam (The King and I): Yes, this may seem like a low ranking to someone who ruled with an iron fist and acted as if he never had a puzzlement (when other people were around). But when you think of how small his country is in, you can see why he doesn’t rank higher.

     18. A.K. (How Now, Dow Jones): Hey, if this multi-mutli-multi-multi millionaire hadn’t started buying stocks during that Panic of ’67, Lord knows where we’d be today.

     19. Wally Womper (How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying): The chairman of the board of the World Wide Wicket Corporation, which is pretty impressive, given that he started out as a window washer.

     20. Daddy Warbucks (Annie and Annie Warbucks): He admits that he only had a few million bucks around the turn of the century but, as he says, “That was a lot of money in those days.”

     21. John P. Wintergreen (Of Thee I Sing and Let ‘Em Eat Cake): F.D.R. was in two musicals, too, but Wintergreen was the first president to do it. He’s the one the people chose.

     22. Billy Flynn (Chicago): If Jesus Christ lived in Chicago today and he had five thousand dollars, let’s just say things would have turned out differently.

     23. Franklin Shepard (Merrily We Roll Along): Now Franklin Shepard, Inc. For him, life is swinging, skies are blue and bells are ringing, ev’ry day he wakes up singing, “Look at me, I’m rich and happy!” And that’s certainly enough to put him high on the list.

     24. Benjamin Stone (Follies): You’re either a poet, or you’re a lover, or you’re the famous Benjamin Stone. You yearn for the women, long for the money, envy the famous Benjamin Stones (the Braques and Chagalls and all that).

     25. Liza Elliott (Lady in the Dark): She’s editor-in-chief of Allure magazine, which influences millions of women. And she must have a good deal of money to own a ship with sails that are made of silk and decks trimmed with gold.

     26. Madame Arcati (High Spirits): Anyone who’s able to get someone deceased to come down from her home, sweet heaven is pretty powerful indeed. No wonder she’s a happy medium.

     27. Michael Bennett (A Class Act): He even had more power than Zach in A Chorus Line.

     28. Horace Vandergelder (Hello, Dolly!): Can you imagine what it was like to be even a half-a-millionaire in those days?

     29. T.T. Grantziger (Gypsy): After all, there isn’t a person in show business who doesn’t need Mr. Grantziger!

     30. J. J. Hunsecker (Sweet Smell of Success): Well, he used to be somebody.

********************

[To contact Peter Filichia directly, e-mail him at pfilichia@aol.com]