The Girl You Talk To is Alyssa May Gold's pitch for the possibility that Jesus was in fact a woman, via her own personal account of being told she was running out of time to have children, her semi-working knowledge of Roman Catholicism from 17 years of Sunday school, and some… extensive late night googling. After months of honing her argument and practicing on her friends, she's ready for the big leagues — a small theater inside a church on the Upper West Side. Is she unhinged or is she a prophet? You tell her.