Esprit de Corpse

Once again, my faithful reader Val Addams was right. “You’re going to be deluged, I’m sure,” he wrote, “with people making suggestions [as to] what Ethan Mordden’s upcoming book should be called.” Indeed! And the e-mails keep rolling in from every side.

This all started when my esteemed TheaterMania colleague Matthew Murray heard that I was reading Mordden’s The Happiest Corpse I’ve Ever Seen (due from Palgrave in October). He said, “I’m already disappointed because of that title” — for, up till now, Mordden has entitled each of his “Broadway-musicals-by-the-decade” series with a lyric from a song title that originated in that decade. But this book, dealing with the last quarter-century of musical theater, takes its title from a 1966 song: “Cabaret,” from Cabaret.

After I wrote a column full of alternate suggestions of titles for Mordden’s book, many of you came up with your own, as Addams predicted. He too offered a few (his most felicitous alternate was “Steppin’ to the Bad Side” from Dreamgirls), just as Jennifer Schultz opted for “Why God, Why?” from Miss Saigon and Neil677 preferred “Everybody Wants To Do A Musical” from Nick & Nora. Meanwhile, Jim Lockwood reported, “I happened to be listening to the new Broadway cast album of Assassins while reading your column, and a perfectly apt title came into my mind: ‘Something Just Broke.'”

Chris Connelly was also in an Assassins’ mode, though he instead recommended “Unworthy of Your Love” before adding some prospective titles drawn from other shows: “Schadenfreude” (Avenue Q), “The Next Best Thing to Love” (A Class Act), “The Point of No Return” (The Phantom of the Opera), and “Who Will Love Me As I Am?” (Side Show). He finally and fittingly chose a song from LaChiusa’s The Wild Party: “When It Ends.” That really would have been wonderfully apt for Mordden’s book, for the image on the front cover is from that production.

Douglas Braverman suggested a couple of titles taken from Avenue Q: “[Gotta Find My] Purpose” and “Only for Now.” Mary Ellen Kelly wrote, “What of ‘New Ways to Dream’ from Sunset Boulevard?” She also suggested “First-Class Roster” and “What a Remarkable Age” from Titanic — but, before long, she was suggesting “To the Lifeboats” and “Godspeed, Titanic,” from the same show.

Larry Mintline really went to town. “I not only came up with titles for a book on Broadway musicals from late 1980 to 2003,” he wrote, “but I also came up with chapter titles. First, the titles: “This Must be the Place” (Grind), “No Day But Today” (Rent), and “Welcome to My Party” (The Wild Party). Now for the chapters:

1. For the chapter on shows that died once their original stars’ contracts ended (the revival of Nine, The Boy from Oz) — “I’m Nothing Without You” (City of Angels).
2. For the chapter on shows that everyone in the press and chat rooms seemed to know were doomed but the producers never seemed to listen (Nick & Nora, Seussical): “The Writing on the Wall” (The Mystery of Edwin Drood) or “Give a Man Enough Rope” (The Will Rogers Follies).
3. For the chapter on the endless parade of musicals made from movies (Big, Urban Cowboy): “The Movie in My Mind” (Miss Saigon).
4. For the chapter on shows that succeeded in spite of themselves (Avenue Q, Urinetown): “Who Would’ve Thought” (The Goodbye Girl).
5. For the chapter on vanity productions (Taboo, Legs Diamond): “My Big Mistake” (The Will Rogers Follies).
6. For the chapter about Off-Broadway shows that should have stayed there (Caroline, or Change): “The Movin’ Uptown Blues” (The Wild Party).
7. For the chapter on shows that are often announced but never get to town (The Visit, The Rhythm Club): “It Needs Work” (City of Angels).
8. For the chapter on shows that outstayed their welcome (Cats, Les Misérables): “I Will Never Leave You” (Side Show) or “Let It Go” (The Full Monty).
9. For the chapter on nudity (The Full Monty, Dracula): “I’m Not Wearing Underwear Today” (Avenue Q).
10. For the chapter on shows whose fans worship them despite critical reception (Jekyll & Hyde, The Scarlet Pimpernel): “What Is This Feeling?” (Wicked).
11. For the chapter paying tribute to those performers who never or rarely miss and always give 100% even in the face of small houses (Bernadette Peters, Betty Buckley): “You Can Always Count on Me” (City of Angels).
12. For the chapter on shows that are almost totally danced (Contact, Movin’ Out): “Dancing Through Life” (Wicked).
13. For the chapter on the effects of DVD, TIVO, the Internet, and reality TV on the Broadway audience: “There is Life Outside Your Apartment” (Avenue Q).
14. For the chapter about shows made from composers’ song catalogues (Smokey Joe’s Cafe, Mamma Mia!): “Scrap” (The Full Monty).

Kevin Dawson was more optimistic: “How about the Cats slogan, ‘Now and Forever?’ Here’s one to convey optimism-cum-irony, from ‘Nowadays’: ‘Isn’t it great, isn’t it swell?’ — and save for the back cover, ‘In fifty years or so / It’s gonna change, ya know.’ But Kevin, Chicago didn’t originate in the last quarter-century, either.

And that brings us to Donald Butchko, who wrote, “I think The Happiest Corpse I’ve Ever Seen is an ideal title for a book about the last 25 years. That it comes from an old show — which, as you said, was revived twice in the book’s time period — seems to allude to the woeful complaint that there is nothing new on Broadway while also implying that, if this is what the Broadway musical looks like when it’s ‘dead,’ then it still looks pretty good! I was born after the ‘Golden Age,’ so the Broadway discussed in this book is the only Broadway I have known. I am rather sick of everyone bemoaning the death of a form that doesn’t seem to be in any more of a state of crisis than it ever was. In reading Mordden’s other books, I saw that there were a lot of weak seasons that produced a lot less memorable fare than some recent years. Hallelujah, Baby! won the Tony and people didn’t seem to think the world was ending. So perhaps a better title for the book would be Move On.”

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[To contact Peter Filichia directly, e-mail him at pfilichia@theatermania.com]