Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the theater, The Neo-Futurists proudly present their sixth-annual series of staged readings of some of the most obscure, trashy, goofy, bizarre, cheesy, and all-around terrible film scripts of all time! These immensely popular one-night-only readings feature some of the best worst films ever made, brought to life on a shoestring budget by The Neo-Futurists and a host of acclaimed guest artists.
List of Films
Xanadu? Xana-don't! Remember when Olivia Newton-John starred in this musical fantasy as a roller-skating, legwarmer-wearing, otherworldly muse who inspires her Earthly lover, Sonny, to open a disco roller rink? With Gene Kelly? Don't lie; you remember the ELO title track. This time... SING ALONG!
She came to save fantasy! What happens when a hard-core porno is staged by a notable children's theater troupe? (Besides hell freezing over?) Please don't bring the kiddies to this Jenna Jameson masterpiece in which our heroine travels to an alternate universe to rescue fantasy from the clutches of an evil demon. How will she do it? Who will she do it with?
Mesa of Lost Women (1953)
Beautiful... kissable... lovable... but deadlier than a Black Widow spider! A harrowing tale of science run amok in the Muerto Desert ("muerto" means death!), where the villainous Dr. Aranya ("aranya" means spider... sort of!) surgically enhances buxom women with the brains of spiders. Crash-landed, confused, and dogged by a really bad soundtrack, how can our protagonists possibly prevail?
Madame X (1966)
There was always a man... there was never a name! An adulteress accidentally kills her lover! Her mother-in-law blackmails her to fake her death! She gets addicted to absinthe and ends up in Mexico! Another blackmailer drags her to New York! She murders the blackmailer! She goes on trial! And her public defender turns out to be...
Afterschool Specialicious -- TRIPLE FEATURE!
Learn, care, and share 'til you puke! First, Gemma Cooper-Novack and Will Act for Food present The 18th Emergency (1974), which teaches you how to deal with the school bully. Then intermission (please put your heads down on your desks). Next, Hell in a Handbag member Merrie Greenfield directs Hey, What About Me? (1987), helping you cope with the new baby in your family, and When Mom and Dad Break Up (1987), so you know how Alan Thicke and Orko from He-Man might handle divorce. Feel better now?
The Ten Commandments (1956)
The Greatest Event in Motion Picture History! Moses heroically delivers his people out of Egypt for approximately one-100th of the original budget!
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